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"Can't Have It All "Written By: Dragonmistress_7 Disclaimer: I don't own the Gundam Wing Boys. Summary: A single night of comfort turns into
Relena's lifetime commitment to the children who came of it, but when
their father's identity comes out, it's hard to see where other important
people in their lives will fit into this strange picture, and if,
somehow, they can all become a family.
Can't Have It All Chapter 7 It was dark when Heero arrived back at Trowa and Quatre’s. Duo met him at the door, staring at him for a long moment without saying anything. Then he silently took his bag and led the way up the stairs to the rooms they were to sleep in. He paused at Heero’s door. “This is your room. Not much of a view, but there’s a big bathtub. My room is on the other end of the hall, last door on right, you know, in case the house catches on fire and you want to come get me and throw me in it, or something.” Again there was an awkward pause, but when he turned to go when Heero said, “Wait. Relena wanted me to give this to you. She said she was saving it, but that she didn’t want it anymore.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a cross. It gleamed a bit as it dangled from his fingers on a slender chain. Duo’s hand came up, but he wavered, as though he feared it would burn him. “I thought I’d lost this.” “You did, in Relena’s bed. The chain broke. She had it fixed. You can wear it without having to worry about losing it again.” “Did-” he hesitated, then his hand closed around the cool metal, “did she say anything about why she kept it? Or why she’s giving it back? Other than what you already said, I mean.” “Only that she was a fool. It seems to be an epidemic. Good night, Duo. Sleep well.” “Good night, Heero. I-I love you.” Heero didn’t respond as the door closed behind him. “So, what are you going to do now?” Trowa asked as he stepped up onto the landing and walked toward Duo. Duo sighed, wrapping his braid around one hand in a nervous gesture as he clutched the cross in the other. “Oh, Trowa, I don’t know. All of my rock-solid reasons suddenly seem like lame excuses. There’s so much that I feel like they just don’t understand. I need to talk to them, I know that.” His eyes were scared and sad as he looked imploringly at his friend. “I don’t want to lose them, any of them, but I may have lost them all. Heero is so hurt, and my name isn’t on anything, so Relena could take the girls any time she wanted to and leave, and Quatre is so upset with me. Why aren’t you, by the way? You’re about the only person who hasn’t at least looked like you wanted to choke me.” “I know you, Duo.” Trowa said with a tiny smile. “I know that you are basically a good person who would not deliberately hurt the people you care about. I know that even though you have not claimed responsibility, you have been responsible for your actions. I know you take care of Relena and your children, and I have faith that your intentions, if misguided, were at least good. The others know all of that as well, but their image of you is obscured by their pain. As for Quatre, he looks up to you so much that he’s forgotten you can make mistakes like the rest of us. He feels betrayed, but his feelings are his own fault, not yours.” “Thank you, Trowa, for that.” Duo gave a weak grin. “Ya know, I think that’s the most I’ve ever heard you say at one time.” “I have a feeling you aren’t going to feel like talking much for a while. Someone will have to fill the silence. Good night, Duo.” Duo replied quietly and walked slowly down the hall to his room. Trowa waited until his door closed before going to his own room, bare feet silent as he crossed the cold hardwood floor. Quatre was sitting at the foot of the bed, shirt half unbuttoned as he stared off into space. “Quatre, quit brooding and get ready for bed,” Trowa admonished as he shut the door behind him. Quatre started and blinked before fixing a long, steady gaze on Trowa. “You’re on his side.” It wasn’t a question, but Trowa felt it necessary, for once, to answer anyway. “Are we dividing into factions now? If so, I suppose the logical question would be, why aren’t you?” “Are you implying that Duo is in the right?” the blonde demanded. “No, no,” Trowa said calmly, “Duo is definitely wrong. But then again, so are you.” Quatre stood up and spun to face him, ready with a retort, only to find one slender finger on his lips. “If someone who worked for you said that, you’d ask them to qualify that statement. Don’t I get the same courtesy?” Trowa asked. Quatre didn’t like it, but he closed his mouth and nodded. He sat back on the bed and looked at his lover expectantly. “Thank you. We’re always harder on those we care about.” Trowa sat down beside Quatre and pulled him into his lap. As he finished unbuttoning the shirt he said, “That is why you are being so hard on Duo. You love him in a way that you will never love me, just as you love me in a way you will never love anyone else. Tell me, Quatre, what are you feeling? Why are you so upset?” Quatre closed his eyes as Trowa comfortingly pressed kisses to his jaw and throat. “I feel angry and- disappointed, I guess. How could he, Trowa?” “What has he done to you, love? Has he betrayed you? Has he disrupted your life? Lied to you?” “Don’t be ridiculous. Duo doesn’t lie,” Quatre said unhappily. He sighed. “I guess he hasn’t done anything to me. Why do I feel like he has, then?” “Because you forget that he can make mistakes, too. You look up to him. So he didn’t tell you. He must have had a reason. It had nothing to do with trust; he didn’t tell Heero, either. You have to see him for what he really is, love. And instead of trying to forgive him, try to realize that, for you, there is nothing to forgive.” Trowa had expected this day to come for a long time and knew that Quatre needed this, no matter how much he didn’t want to admit it. Quatre hugged his lover tightly. “You’re right, of course. I guess I have unfair expectations of Duo. I should at least hear him out before passing judgment. I’ll talk to him tomorrow.” Trowa kissed him softly. “I think that would be a good idea. You’re very important to him, and he already stands to lose so much.” Relena looked up to find the sun coming up. A dozen half-formed plans of action flitted through her mind, but none of them would solidify. Looking around her room somewhat ruefully, she knew that whatever one she did eventually come up with, it would involve getting away from this place. A half-packed suitcase lay on her bed, clothes scattered around it from the numerous times she’d changed her mind about leaving, only to change it back. The vid-phone beeped, and she pressed the button. When
she saw who it was, a plan, more solid than any previous, formed and
she seized it before logic could step in with a veto. “Can I
come stay with you?” ~ * ~ |
